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Looking back on my life when I was single, I realize that one of the things that probably most contributed to my dating roller coaster was this whole idea of boundaries, or, the lack of them. One thing that is sooo important to discuss is this idea of how to set boundaries when you’re dating someone new.

The simplest way to think of boundaries in dating and relationships is: At what point do we stand up and let someone know we are not okay with something they are doing?

It sounds so simple.

But it’s not. In fact, it’s far from simple.

Here’s the problem with setting boundaries: in order for us to have boundaries in a relationship we have to know ourselves, have total respect for ourselves, and be willing to take a risk in order to stand by a boundary.

As women we believe that the more low-maintenance we are — the more easy going and chill — the more men will want to be with us.

And so, we try to be like that. I call it being “the cool girl.”

But here’s the harsh truth: if you accept crumbs from men, if you say “yes” to dates planned last minute, texting just to talk dirty without ever asking you out, if you meet him at ten o’clock after drinks with the guys — if you don’t have boundaries, and don’t know how to state and express your expectations and needs directly, men will start to devalue you.

As a result, they begin to see you as Ms. Right Now rather than Mrs. Right.

You’re really smart, and because this isn’t your first time in the game, maybe you’re long done hooking up with men you met at a bar at midnight or maybe you aren’t, but the bottom line is this.

When you are a caring, kind woman who genuinely wants to make a man happy, you may have the “cool girl” mentality and not even realize you’re doing it.

What I need for you to understand is that not only do you not want to accept crumbs but that you actually deserve cake and that, when you expect it and know how to communicate it in a powerful feminine way, men will actually want you more, not less.

This is how you begin to get past the third and fourth date, and is just one of the many dynamic tools I teach my coaching clients.

You are powerful.

I remember when my client Allison understood this at a very deep level.

At first she felt like men held all the power – that they were picking her or rejecting her.

She quickly realized that she could be the one doing the choosing and that she set the tone.

That’s when everything started to change for her.

She began dating from a place of self-worth, confidence, and abundance.

She realized that she knew how to be highly attractive to men, and she could become a savvy dater, communicating to men what she wanted in a way that actually inspired them to become that guy.

Allison realized that you only get what you settle for, and if you settle for just “good enough” when it comes to love, that’s what you will get.

As you learn how to master that ability of setting boundaries and standing by them, you will find that dating is a whole lot less frustrating, and begin attracting in high-quality men who want to commit to you.

This is why I still offer one-on-one sessions when so many others have gone to automated programs: to give you back hope. To show you that you can have effortless power.

Let today be the day that transforms everything in YOUR love life.

It’s time that you say “YES!” to having the kind of love you’ve been dreaming about for so many years.

Click here to say yes to YOU and book your first coaching session today.

With all my love,

XO
Alexis