Saturday didn’t start out great.
I had a client call, which I was late to, because I couldn’t find my phone.
I was beyond tired and didn’t know why. I was frustrated and a little worried about being so tired. There were errands that needed to be run but I didn’t want to do them. And Kai was teething and wouldn’t settle down because he was in pain.
Some days, you just have nothing.
There is nothing in the tank and nothing left to give. Some days, you don’t feel like a million bucks, no matter how desperately you want to.
Some days, all you can do, is be compassionate and kind to yourself.
To realize that it’s okay to not be able to do it all. To not give your kids the energy or time you wish you could. To release the guilt from wanting a little space and rest.
When we have nothing left, our body is simply signaling to us that we need to slow down. If we ignore our body, it will eventually make us slow down. Don’t be afraid, as I was, that something is wrong with you because you’re feeling a little off. Your body is just giving you the gift to tune in and give it some rest.
This has been the biggest lesson for me since becoming a mother.
When Kai was first born, everyone told me to nap when he naps. Not being a natural napper, I would use that time to get household chores done.
But on Saturday, when there was just nothing in the tank, I listened…
I went for a short walk with my family.
I narrowed down the 1 or 2 errands that needed to be done, and left the rest for another day.
I came home and ran myself a hot bath while Kai was napping.
I fell asleep on the couch.
I felt a bit better, made a healthy, simple dinner, and watched a movie with my husband.
I stretched before bed to quiet my mind, and woke up on Sunday feeling refreshed.
A crappy day doesn’t have to turn into a crappy week, or month. Some days are just sad days. Or tired days. Or frustrating days. And that’s okay.
Listen to the messages they are trying to give you. Do what you need to be kind to yourself. And simply let it pass…
Are there some days where you feel like you’ve got nothing left? Let me know in the comments!
Love,
Alexis
Yes. I find myself feeling guilty when my girls go to bed and I feel I didn’t spend enough time with them. My mood was off yesterday, with everything going on here in Orlando, and I felt guilty before bed because I didn’t feel like my girls got enough of my attention. But then I stopped washing the dishes, sat down and gave myself a minute. I gave myself a pep talk (which sounds silly but it works for me) and gave myself a break. Did my toes, took a longer shower and had a guided meditation for bed. Woke up in a better mood today and getting back on track. I’m learning that we need a break and a little time to step back.
Hi Karen. Thanks for sharing! Absolutely. Especially since you live in Orlando and with the tragedy that just happened – how could you not feel a little off? It just shows you’re human, and your feeling the natural mix of emotions that goes with something like that. I’m so glad you were able to give yourself a break and take a little time to step back. Then you can spend a little extra time the next day or on the weekend giving your girls love and attention <3
Hi Alexis. I’m a mother of an 80 pound and growing fur baby (Rottweiler/German Shepherd mix) and from what I’ve heard, raising a puppy sounds a lot like raising a baby. The other day, I told myself I should get up and walk my dog, first thing in the morning. But what I really wanted to do was sit and enjoy my cup of coffee. I changed the dialog in my head to say that’s the kind of dog owner I’m going to be and that it’s ok. I’ll walk him after I have coffee. Yes, I had to bribe my dog with a bone but shortly thereafter, he fell asleep. I shared this story in a support group, thinking it was so trivial, I shouldn’t share, but I did anyway. After the meeting, a woman came and thanked me. She had told herself a similar story about raising a dog. She was almost in tears over having someone out there to relate with. Thank you, Alexis, for your openness and honesty.
Hi Rebecca,
Thanks for sharing your story! I love that you shared this in a support group, even though you thought it was trivial, and it turned out to be just what someone else needed to hear and relate to. That’s great you were able to change the self-talk in your head to ‘that’s the kind of dog owner I’m going to be’ rather than beating yourself up over it. And I’m sure your pup didn’t mind at all! xo
Oooh Alexis, I know exactly that feeling. It started on Saturday when my boyfriend woke up with a terrible sharp pain on his abdomen. I felt so useless as there was nothing I could do to make it better beside comforting him, since he hates hospitals, I couldn’t even suggest it to him to seek medical help cause I would get this “just shut up look”. My day was just terrible having to soothe and calm a big baby. Looking on the positive side we ended up spending our quality time together, just talking and laughing, overlooking his pain. Later on he was a much better man.
Thanks for sharing Lerato! I’m so glad that you were able to end the day on a positive note spending quality time together 🙂