Have you ever had a time in your life where something really awesome happened, something big…and you ended up sabotaging yourself?
Perhaps you got a nice raise at work or met someone who just seems perfect for you…but then those critical thoughts come up.
Do I really deserve this?
Am I good enough?
What if I screw this up?
And because subconsciously we don’t really believe that we can have it all, we get sick, or pick a fight with our partner, or screw up at work.
In Gay Hendrick’s amazing book, The Big Leap, he describes this phenomenon as upper limiting ourselves. We set our internal thermostat for how much love, money, success, etc. we think we can have in our lives.
Then as soon as we start to bust through our upper limit we knock ourselves back down to our comfort zone.
I wanted to write about this today because it’s been coming up in my life a lot lately.
I had a conversation with a client recently who is starting a new business. Now starting a new business is a combination of excitement and total fear. Talk about busting through an upper limit!
She was finding herself becoming extremely disorganized and cluttered. This made her feel miserable and more difficult to do any work on her business.
During our call I explained about the Big Leap and it totally clicked. She had taken a day to step back, give herself some space and re-organize. Turned out to be just the thing to get back on track!
In my first year of business I experienced my upper limit a lot. Every time I’d push out of my comfort zone or experience a breakthrough I’d get sick for about a week. I started recognizing this as a symptom of the upper limit, and rather than taking it as a sign to stop, I took it as a sign to expand my possibilities and keep going.
Think about when you were a little kid and perhaps you were about to do your first dive off a diving board. Chances are you were terrified. You maybe stood at the edge of the diving board, knees shaking, feeling like you were up there for eternity.
Then, you jumped!
You did it! And it was exhilarating. Thrilling. Terrifying.
But then you got back up there and the next time it wasn’t so bad. Maybe you were even daring enough to try something harder.
That’s how it is with life.
I am here to tell you that the sky’s the limit.
If it’s a new job you want, you can have it.
If it’s that big love you know deep inside you deserve, you’re worthy of it.
If it’s finally paying off all that debt, you can do it.
But it might be frightening. That’s okay. Use fear to push you in the direction you need to go.
Peace and big leaps,
P.S. I recently did an interview on Crazy Wild Love Radio with Courage Coach Billy Anderson. If you want more help busting through your upper limit, listen here and get Billy’s best tips on how to overcome fear and live an awesome life.